Friday, June 21, 2013

Axiom 36: The Problem of You

"The way we see the problem is the problem." -Stephen Covey

"A problem is a chance for you to do your best." -Duke Ellington

A problem is an opportunity, not a setback. For too long people have blamed problems on others. I'm here today to tell you most of your problems are opportunities in disguise.

Everyone has troubles in life from time to time, but ultimately it is who you blame for those troubles and how you react to those troubles that defines your world.

Don't get me wrong - everyone deserves help when they're in trouble. The problem is when some people continuously blame other people instead of themselves for all of their life's woes. By blaming other people they give away control of the situation. It creates this perpetual mental state of negativity and misery. They instigate a continuous cycle of bad luck that they think they have no power over.  

For example - let's look at the mentality of someone who blames them self for an impending foreclosure versus someone who blames everyone else.

First, the person who identifies them self as the problem:
"It's my fault this foreclose happened. I should have put at least 20% down on the home so my payments were lower. I should have had six months of savings in the bank. I should have bought a house I knew I could afford. I'll try to find some temporary work I wouldn't normally do so I can try to pay my mortgage until I can get a job I really want again. However, if they foreclose my house I know what I need to know to keep this from happening again."
Now here is the person that blames everyone else as the problem:
"The bank and the government shouldn't have approved my home loan knowing I may not be able to afford it. It's their fault they didn't require a bigger down payment. Everyone deserves a home. It's in society's best interest to bail me out since they created this mess to begin with."
People that think they're being oppressed, people that feel they're entitled, people that believe in bad luck, they all tend to see the glass as half-empty. The people that view themselves in control of their problems view the glass as half-full. They're able to accept the blame and make constructive criticism against themselves.   

So the next time something bad happens blame yourself first for a change. Ask yourself what you could have done differently to avoid that situation. You'll learn more when you admit you're the problem, not someone else.